The Little Things

Today has been a very busy day, so this will be a short post but I had a thought I wanted to share.

You know the expressions "it's the little things in life..."? Usually that expression is used as an abbreviation for "It's the little things that make life worth living". However, the expression "the straw that broke the camel's back" shows that it is also the little things that can get to us. You can use this knowledge in your favor!

When you are having a rough day and lots of little things are wearing on your patience and adding to your stress level, remind yourself to deal with one at a time and let each go as you do. If you do that, they cannot build and build until the dam that holds your sanity intact breaks.

If you are facing a very large trial, project, or mess, remind yourself that this mountain is made up of little mole hills. If you can identify those smaller pieces and work on one at a time, you will be halfway done before you know it! Don't try to deal with the mountain as a whole. It will seem impossible and overwhelming and that is what defeats so many of us before we get started.

The other thing that we can do is to look for those little things in life that make it worthwhile: a beautiful sunset, a smile or hug from someone you love, a moment of peace after the chaos, the song of a bird after a storm, a good book, a warm mug of hot cocoa when you come in from the cold, a song that lifts your spirits, a Bible verse that reminds you God loves you and hears you.

His mercies are new every morning

At our house, I have had to use all of these this week.
If you have been following, you know that we have several major (work intensive) projects going on for the house. Partly because they are all interrelated and partly because I have to stop when the weather starts changing and refocus on the farm. If I think about them all at once, it becomes very difficult to figure out what to do next and the amount is overwhelming. If I stop and choose one task and focus on the simple details of "What goes here? What must I do to get it here?" then I can see a path toward completion.

 How B thinks the puzzles should be kept

In my last post I mentioned that the kids had been out of school for three days (and they got half a day yesterday for weather). In those three and a half days, we have had three major meltdowns which ended up in discipline (as I tell J, even when you are upset, you are not allowed to be disrespectful and disobedient) and they all started over something minor! Then B decided that she did not like things being all organized and put away and every time I put something away, she would pull it out. I had been working on the kitchen and we have a couple of shelves for puzzles, coloring stuff, playdoh and cards. I had finally containerized in what we thought she wouldn't be able to open. When I saw everything pulled out for the fifth or fiftieth time, I really felt like giving up. This is where the "deal with one thing at a time and let it go" came in handy.

And in the midst of all of this, I saw a beautiful sunrise and two magnificent sunsets. My SWC wanted to cuddle with me after apologizing for his behavior. My horse gave me an extra nuzzle. I heard several messages and songs on the radio that reminded me that God is near, he loves me and he will get me through.

Another reminder that this is all in God's hands

God is near. He loves you. He will get you through. Take it one step at a time and don't worry about the rest.

Schedule Your Priorities

In our country today, we have become very good at being busy. We schedule so many things in our lives that we don't really have time for any of them. Of course, if you've been reading this blog, you know that this is something I have struggled with as well. As I try to organize the house, which is going to take several major projects, and catch up on the farm work, I must be careful not to neglect the things that are most important.

Regardless of whether my projects are complete or not, my family and my friends still need my time and attention. If I do not take the time to develop those relationships now, I will miss my chance. Friendships develop or fade as you share thoughts, feelings and experiences. Kids will continue to grow and will move on, whether I spend the time to be close to them or not. And if I want my marriage to be as strong (hopefully stronger) when they have grown up and moved out, then I must devote time to my husband and our relationship. You hear about couples who were so busy taking care of the house and the kids that, when their kids are gone, they have nothing left to talk to each other about. I do not want that to be what's in store for me and my Mr- that's not what I married him for.

Similarly, if I do not take time to know God more and get my focus on Him, then I may miss his guiding as I go through my day. It is all too easy to become caught up in the daily tasks and trials. If we want our lives to be about more than the mundane of the day to day, we must have a focus and a purpose that is greater than what is in front of us.

One thing I have learned about myself: if I don't purposefully schedule something, it's not likely to happen. The thing that "I'll do it when I get a chance" will stay just that because there will always be just one more thing that needs to get done. That was what led to my post about making time to ride my horses, which is a pretty high priority for me that I have rarely gotten to do in the last ummm three years. I have to schedule time to meet with God and to be with my friends and family. If I don't, it will either be very infrequent or not happen at all. My mom and I took action on this several months ago when we realized we only saw each other when they were babysitting. Now we have a standing weekly lunch date. We still occasionally miss one, but we see each other a lot more than we did before it was on our calendars. Now I just need to find time to do that with my hubby (sans kids) and friends (we may Have to bring the kids!).

With that in mind, this week I have "scheduled" time to read my Bible (I also like to listen to some of the programs on the radio) and I took some time while my kids were out of school (they got Three days for MLK!) to just be with them and play with them and love on them. And, since part of my greater purpose is trying to raise my kids to be people of character, we have also been introducing (or continuing) some lessons to help them become self-sufficient adults who are compassionate and generous with others. Some of these for J involve simple work and giving him responsibility for a share of the household tasks. I have told him that, in a family, we all help each other. We work best as a team. Of course, B isn't old enough for all of that yet, but we are even teaching her. She is old enough to hang up her own jacket (we have low hooks she can reach) and pick up her toys and put them in the bin. Now we just have to figure out sharing...

Take some time today to spend with the ones you love!

The Sun is Still Shining

The last couple of days here have been grey and dreary. Yesterday morning, it was so dark that J thought he had woken up too early and went back to bed! This morning, as we drove to school, J noticed that we couldn't see where the sun was.

Now, he's a smart boy. Of course he knows the sun is still there but this gave us an opportunity to talk about God and life. We talked about how, even though we can't see the sun, it is shining just as bright today as it is on sunny days. The clouds are just in the way. And eventually the clouds will move on and we will be able to see the sun again.

Similarly, there will be clouds that come in our life; times that are dreary or difficult when we can't feel God there. That doesn't mean he isn't there. He is just as powerful and loves us just as much on days that are hard as on days that are fun and easy. And if we concentrate on the knowledge that he IS there and that he DOES love us, then we can get through those hard times until the clouds pass and the sun comes out again.

So, if you are having a cloudy, dreary, rainy season in your life, just remember:
God is still there.
God is still powerful.
God still loves you.
The clouds will pass.

Neighbor's Chorus

This morning my dogs decided that they reeeeeeally needed to go potty at 4:00 in the morning. Or chase a rabbit, I don't know. Either way I was still laying there, wide awake, at 5:00 so I decided to get up and be productive. I didn't want to wake everybody else up, so I headed to the barn. Sometimes it's nice to have somewhere to go where I don't have to worry about everyone else.

As I was cleaning stalls, a song popped into my head as often happens, having been a one-time music person. This particular song was one that we did in the Charlotte Chorale. It's a song by Jaques Offenbach called "The Neighbor's Chorus". It's a very interesting piece and a lot of fun to sing. It's very fast, upbeat and expressive, just a lot of fun. What makes it interesting is the subject that the singers are so chipper about.

Apparently the singers are a group of neighbors and they have spied someone who looks depressed. They sing "we don't mean to bother...why do you look so low?" and then go on to cheerfully speculate what has caused the blues. They assume it's a "lost lady love" and begin with "did she treat you badly? Did she break a date?" and quickly move onto what He could have done to her. The music gets more glorious as the accusations become more serious and there's a final glowing "aaaahhhhh" after they have accused him of beating her!

How in the World is this fun!?! Why was the music written this way?
Offenbach picked up on something that the tabloids know all too well. We (people) Love the pain and failure of others. It makes us feel better about our own troubles and failures, mostly the failures.

This instinct, this Need to compare ourselves is innate in all of us. Why? Why would God have made that in us? I don't think His desire was for us to go around pointing out the faults of others so we can validate ourselves. In fact, Jesus tells us the exact opposite: In Matthew 7:3-5 He tells us to deal with the plank in our own eye (life) before we start pointing out anyone else's speck. Notice that ours is a plank and theirs is a speck.

I think that we have this desire to compare is because we are supposed to compare ourselves to God and to His standard of perfection. If we do that, several things happen:
1. We will see just how undeserving we are of heaven and of his love.
2. We will begin to understand just how big of a thing it is that He has given us his love despite how unworthy we are (and appreciate it more).
3. When we realize #1 and #2, we should be more willing to show love and grace to people that we feel are undeserving of our love.
If we are honest with ourselves about how many faults and sins he is looking past to love us, shouldn't we be willing to overlook the faults of others and share that love with them?

It doesn't matter what the faults or sins or opinions are. You don't have to agree with them to love them. God certainly has not been happy about everything I've done and said and thought in my life. But He has chosen to love me anyway and Because He First Loved Me, I Will Love Others.

Now, for your entertainment, The Neighbor's Chorus

The Butterfly Inside

Every now and then God allows a momentary glimpse of the spiritual world.

For some reason, J has been asking questions about dying over the last week or so. He has asked questions before but not over an extended time like this. Perhaps, now that the excitement of Christmas is over, he is beginning to process what he learned about Newtown.

On the way to school this morning, he asked what happens to the brain. At school they have been learning about the body and what each part does. We have talked about the spirit (the who you are inside, as I explained to J) being separate from the body and he seems to understand that. I think he could not align the idea that our "who we are" leaves the body when we die, but that the brain stays behind with the rest of the body.

Can I just say "wow"? I am amazed at this little boy! And glad in my heart that he is thinking beyond just this physical world that we live in.

After I got past my stuttering, I told him that, while we use our brain to send the signals for thought, our actual thoughts and opinions are a part of the "who we are inside" with the spirit. Being a "word picture" person, I wanted a visual to help him understand how they body and spirit separate. I thought about the tent metaphor, but that didn't feel right. A tent is temporary and can be taken down and put back up many times over.

Then it hit me:
Our bodies are the chrysalis surrounding the spirit. We all start out as caterpillars. When we come to know Jesus, our spirits begin to change and grow. The more we become like Jesus, the more we become like the person God created us to be, the more like butterflies we become. When we are finally finished becoming butterflies, we (as J says) explode out of the shell! The body, the chrysalis, stays behind, empty.


Then J said something important: "So the butterfly either goes up or down."
Ahh, there's the tricky part. If you are not a Christian, you don't have Jesus in your heart to start changing you to be more like him. If you are not growing and becoming more like Jesus, you can't become a butterfly.

So what about people who don't believe? Well, what happens if a bird catches a caterpillar and eats it? Does he become a butterfly? Nope. He died still a caterpillar. And only butterflies can go to heaven. And that is why it is so important to let our friends know about Jesus; so they have a chance to believe in him so they can become butterflies too.


Later in the day I was thinking how ugly our sin makes us to God. And then I thought about this little talk with J and realized that God created us to be amazingly beautiful butterflies. We can achieve that if we follow Him with our hearts.